6.29.2009

Waiting

silver turtle charms by hint jewelryTurtle Mother Charms, Beth Hemmila (Hint Jewelry): fine silver

Recently some friends and I were discussing the concept of choice, and how frustrating it can be when faced with making a difficult decision based on the model of choosing either "yes" or "no." I've found it especially difficult when the two choices presented either put you in the camp of social misfits or force you to ignore your well-being. This is the mouse trap of black and white thinking.

On the surface it appears this trap could cause a lot of suffering, but lately I've realized that this place of social pressure can be an opportunity for liberating a thinking pattern. If in its most natural state the world always offers multiplicity, then what are our other options besides "yes" or "no?"

One idea occurred to me as I sat between "yes" and "no" is that we have waiting? Gosh, YES! Waiting feels pretty good to me!! I'm noticing that amazing things happen when you invite waiting into your world. I say this with a cheeky grin, because anyone close to me knows that I am by instinct an impatient person :)

Nevertheless, I've been trying waiting on for size over the last several years. Waiting three times as long as I normally would for a response from a student. Waiting for my husband to find the words to explain something important. Waiting for coworkers to sort out a computer problem on their own before diving in and fixing it for them. Waiting for my cat to make the decision if he wants to stay in or go out. And waiting for the perfect design to come to me at the right moment...as slow and effortless as a turtle...just patiently waiting to be named, written about and posted in Etsy.

I'm sure there are hundreds of choices between "yes" and "no." Have you found a way of multiplying the choices available to you? Have you experienced anything wondrous by waiting?

4 comments:

  1. Beth, you are so right on! The older I get, the more I enjoy "the journey" (my version of your "waiting") and in fact, with age, I have realized that the journey is as important if not more important than the destination (which that were my original concept, alas, it's not). I, too, would be described by those close to me as impatient and expecting immediate results. My profession and my clients expect this of me and of the legal system but in my personal life, I am a lot more patient now. For example, right now, I am growing three types of beans in my garden (I love climbers) and I so enjoying "watching" them grow, slowly, patiently, gradually, at their own pace, not mine. THEY are slowing me down and I love it!

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  2. Thank you for adding a bit of grey to my day! I love "wait" that and "I don't know". I feel like a good "I don't know" offers a lot. In this google it and know world, sometimes not knowing and saying so takes the weight off! It's ok not to "know" everything...

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  3. AJ, I love the story of patience and your three beans. What fun to watch them evolve over the summer without having to make anything happen. Slow is in!!

    Gaea, three cheers for glorious grey and "I don't know" status :) I'm loving that idea too. Saying it is like an instant cat nap!

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  4. love your turtles... as a lifetime grey area person, it works for me... it did not when taking sat's for college... but we're looking at the larger picture now! while some may call it indecisive, i feel that the decisions made are more thought-filled...

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